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Alright, girls, if you haven’t figured it out yet, there are going to be, like, a MILLION of these freaking Marvel movies in the next 10 years. Get over yourselves, go to a ComiCon (how DOES one properly capitalize this?), and see these movies full of CG, sexy men and violence. Trust me.

2013

Chris Hemsworth as Thor

Tom Hiddleston as Loki

Natalie Portman as Jane

Anthony Hopkins as Odin

Christopher Eccleston as Malekith

Directed by Alan Taylor

Synopsis: It’s been two years since the appearance of Thor and his Asgardian pals in New Mexico; about a year since the events in New York. Of course, Loki, the adopted black sheep of the family, is at the center of all of the drama in both cases, but Thor took care of that last year. Jane’s pissed because he said he’d call and never did. He does show up in London, however, after we learn of the dark elves and Malekith, their leader, and their obsession with the aether, a Gem of Power that can make the entire universe turn dark at the time of the convergence. The aether has attached itself to Jane, so we gotta bring in the godlike Asgardians to figure stuff out and defeat the bad guy.

The dialogue and banter are much more modern the second time around, mostly because of the events in New York; Thor has developed a penchant for wit (and sentences with shorter words), so it’s a little punchy at times, but overall enjoyable. The effects are, as in all Marvel movies, simply Marvel-ous (sorry…had to). The character effects were probably my favorite; Kurse and Malekith were fantastic to look at.

Thank you, production team, for setting the film in London. As always, I giggle and bounce in my chair at the sight of my favorite place on the planet.

Fun bits:

• Loki playing around after a heated discussion with Thor. Bringing in the Cap was inspired. So funny! “Hey,
you wanna have a rousing discussion about truth, honor, patriotism?” Oh, the confidence!
• Every scene with Stellan Skarsgard. Luckily he’s not totally repulsive, or the pants scene would never have
worked. Or Stonehenge. I shudder to think…
• Everyone threatening Loki with his life in order to prevent his betrayal. Duh. Of course there will be a line.
• Kat Dennings. She’s just too cute. I love that Taylor let the improv occur…banana balls?! Does she ever
actually say Ian’s name?

Weepy Meter: 2/10 It’s kind of romantic, okay? Jeez…he said he’d call (show up, whatever), he got busy with
stuff, took him a while, but he did make it back. And he never stopped thinking about her. Then a
bunch of really crummy stuff happens, people die…you people are made of STONE!

Man Meter: 7/10 He’s already seen it.

Overall Rating: 6/10 A bit too campy and cheesy for me, but there are pretty people to watch, and I will sit through
anything with Anthony Hopkins. Plus it’s a Marvel. (Do with that what you will.)

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