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2001

Jack Black as Hal
Gwyneth Paltrow as Rosemary
Jason Alexander as Mauricio
Anthony Robbins as himself
Written and directed by the Farrelly brothers

Synopsis: Hal’s father passed away when he was young, leaving him some odd deathbed advice: date the hot girls. Adult Hal is all about this idea—he only goes after the girls that are physically appealing (hence the title of the movie). After a random accident leaves him stuck in an elevator with a self-help guru, he suddenly sees women based on their inner beauty (which is shown on-screen as physical beauty). He gets super excited to be dating one of the most beautiful women alive, but pal Mauricio is concerned for Hal and his apparent lack of judgment.

I’ll probably catch a little flak for this one, but I think this is possibly one of the funniest movies I own. It’s near the top of the Farrelly meter. Obviously, the moral is not to judge a book by its cover. This is evident throughout the movie. However, due to the writer/directors’ bizarre sense of humor (it’s a black comedy, folks. Take it easy on ‘em), it could be seen as blatant discrimination. I like it. I think it shows people how crummy we can be when we judge others, makes us take some ownership for our actions and words, and then shows us how even the most shallow of individuals can see the light and become a good person. Inspiring stuff.

Favorite bits:
• Hal’s first night on the town after being granted a new perspective. The music is fantastic (who doesn’t love Phoenix?!) and Mauricio has a couple of really great (if stinging) one-liners.
• Every scene with Jack Black. He’s so GREAT in this film! I think the best part is how a regular Joe like Jack plays the main character—he’s not the typical, super-hot underwear model that you’d expect to have this kind of ego when it comes to dating women. I think that’s part of the inside joke that the movie keeps telling itself. He’s completely hysterical.
• Gwyneth’s milkshake scene. Yeah. Because THAT’S possible. Totally awesome. Write about THAT on your Goop blog, lady!
• A vestigial TAIL?????!!!!! One of the best appliances ever! Who the HELL came up with that?!
Again, if you’ve got all your wits and sensibilities about you when you watch this, you’ll think I’m a hugely judgmental person for liking this movie so much. You’ve gotta remember, though, that it’s a Farrelly brothers movie. Leave that crap at the door. It’s not PC and you know it. You’ve seen There’s Something About Mary and Dumb & Dumber. There’s NOTHING PC about these guys. And Roger Ebert agrees with me. So suck it up and watch it. Saw this with my dad. He LOVES this movie. One of our family’s personal cult faves. (We’re not bigots, I promise. Some of the most open-minded people you’ll ever have the pleasure of meeting.)

Weepy Meter: 2/10 You’ll either tear up at the end, when you’re expected to, or you’ll be freaking pissed off and crying because you can’t control your anger. My money’s on the former.
Man Meter: 6/10 It’s Jack Black, so that’s a plus. There’s hot girls, so that’s a bigger plus. But it IS a RomCom, so that drops it down a couple of notches. He’ll probably be worried about laughing and offending you, so you just need to laugh when it’s funny. You’ll both enjoy it more.
Overall Rating: 8/10 There’s a line near the end that’s TOTALLY backwards, stated in such a way that you cock your head to the side, Labrador Retriever-style, and go “huh?”. Kinda throws me off a bit. The cast is great, though, and coupled with Black’s incredible performance, the soundtrack also delivers. Cool stunts, too…love the little kid in the tree.

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